roads not taken
I am sitting at work because the appointment I travelled in for called earlier to cancel, although no one is there on Sunday morning to receive the call.
So, here I am, for the second time in 2 days, waiting at work because of an appointment that didn't show up.
I am crushed, but also exasperated as I am very busy otherwise and have many undone things awaiting attention as I show up for people who don't show up for me.
I recieved a message from Amy about South America today and so, I started to spend time looking up things about a shaman from there. While watching a video, the door which I believe I locked opens and in walks a fiercely radiant young woman my age asking after a massage.
Now.
I am due to meet people in an hour and a half and since I am using public transport on a Sunday, the next train was in 56 minutes. So, I quickly figured I could not give her an appointment.
I told her I was sorry that I couldn't, and I was. I apologized too much I think.
She left and I felt deflated, the way you feel when you have done something stupid and wrong because of hard-headedness or some other terrible reason.
I sat contemplating what that meant. It was clearly a message.
And what I have come up with is this, which I do not want to forget.....
If I want to live a life of joy, if I want to serve my highest purpose and work towards a worthy goal, then I must learn to hear with my heart and be willing to compromise seemingly concrete plans for a curvier path when conditions change.
I have often been too impulsive and often too rigid. And it must be with the heart that I hear, it must be with the yoni that I respond.
Oh dear Sophia, please be my ally!
The wolf, she knows how to play, but when there is something to hunt, she is focus itself.
The horse knows how to relax, but when there is a race, she becomes the wind in a moment.
The honeybee knows how to sip honey, but when the sun shines, she will transform the sun into ambrosia.
I bow at the feet of these creatures to help me remember this wisdom.
So, here I am, for the second time in 2 days, waiting at work because of an appointment that didn't show up.
I am crushed, but also exasperated as I am very busy otherwise and have many undone things awaiting attention as I show up for people who don't show up for me.
I recieved a message from Amy about South America today and so, I started to spend time looking up things about a shaman from there. While watching a video, the door which I believe I locked opens and in walks a fiercely radiant young woman my age asking after a massage.
Now.
I am due to meet people in an hour and a half and since I am using public transport on a Sunday, the next train was in 56 minutes. So, I quickly figured I could not give her an appointment.
I told her I was sorry that I couldn't, and I was. I apologized too much I think.
She left and I felt deflated, the way you feel when you have done something stupid and wrong because of hard-headedness or some other terrible reason.
I sat contemplating what that meant. It was clearly a message.
And what I have come up with is this, which I do not want to forget.....
If I want to live a life of joy, if I want to serve my highest purpose and work towards a worthy goal, then I must learn to hear with my heart and be willing to compromise seemingly concrete plans for a curvier path when conditions change.
I have often been too impulsive and often too rigid. And it must be with the heart that I hear, it must be with the yoni that I respond.
Oh dear Sophia, please be my ally!
The wolf, she knows how to play, but when there is something to hunt, she is focus itself.
The horse knows how to relax, but when there is a race, she becomes the wind in a moment.
The honeybee knows how to sip honey, but when the sun shines, she will transform the sun into ambrosia.
I bow at the feet of these creatures to help me remember this wisdom.
posted by hymenoptera's honey at 8:37 PM
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